i will drown

In case you ever need to brighten your day: Best of Olivia Wilde's Twitter

  • Is it wrong that the only time I've been in the gym in the last month is to buy peanut butter smoothies? I try my best to lunge in and out.
  • A mosquito just bit my ass so hard it almost felt good. Except now I can't sit down without a hemroid pillow. #thanksmaryland
  • Wait I forgot- running smack into a blind man while texting - good luck or bad luck?
  • Auto-correct strikes again. My phone turns "fed" into "F'ed" which is awkward when telling my roommate I gave the dog his food.
  • Woot woot! Teen Choice Awards Nomination whaaaat? So awesome. Thank you guys very much. I'm glad teens like Dr. shows and not just porn.
  • I know I'm in new york when I find myself at Sing Sing at 3am karaoke-ing my balls off with a bunch of beautiful strangers...and pizza.
  • in a thousand years archeologists will dig up tanning beds and think we fried people as punishment.
  • AAND my favorite:
  • Glad the rapture didn't happen since I just got waxed.

leatheriskawaii:

iampolemical:

leatheriskawaii:

Always funny to see women act like men don’t have to deal with body issues.

I mean, it’s not like there’s super hot Abercrombie models or Robert Downey JR. or Tom Hiddleston or you know anything like that to compete with.

Oh yes, bacause the world is full of magazines directed to boys, telling them how do they have to look since they are twelve. Full!

Oh really?

Men’s Health, Nylon Guys, Complex, Details, Esquire, GQ, Maxim, Men’s Fitness, Cafe, certain guitar magazines (I mean look at fucking Dave Mustaine he is a god incarnate), Loaded, FLEX, Hardgainer, Iron Man, Milo, Muscle & Fitness, Muscle & Fitness-Britian, Muscular Development, Planet Muscle, Powerlifting USA, Sly, Stronman, Testosterone, and on and on and on.

Society is obsessed with bodies.

Women?
They want to be slim and stunning.
Usually to be attractive to their selves and men.
Or women.

Men?
They want to be ripped and chiseled.
Usually to attract women.
Or men.
And then lastly to satisfy their confidence, usually.


barackfuckingobama:

zeldea:

why cant americans just use celsius it’s so much easier to spell than feiehreirheineiheit

do you mean degrees of FREEDOM

I like metric, I really do, but Fahrenheit is indisputably better for weather. Seriously. 100 is hot, 0 is cold, 50 or 60 is in the middle, 70 or 80 is warm. You can tell immediately by the tens digit whether you need a jacket, a coat, or shirtlessness.

Celsius has way less precision than Fahrenheit. It’s always in the 20s or 30s. What is seriously the deal with that.

Celsius is good for scientific purposes, but Fahrenheit is way way better than Celsius for weather, because in that situation, Fahrenheit is more metric than Celsius.